Saying "thank you" is something most everyone learns at a young age. Moms and dads teach their toddlers, new to the world of talking, the importance of the two little words and feel proud when they hear the words used (and often scold them when the words aren't used.)
And as we grow up, most of us remember to use "thank you" and if not, thoughts go through the minds of those that expect to hear those words but don't, "My goodness. Didn't his/her parents teach any manners?"
There are many occasions that a "sarcastic" thank you comes into play, for gestures that are offending or cause inconvenience. These "thank yous" are better left said under your breath or while your window is rolled up. I've made a list of some of those incidents:
* When you are waiting on the road for cars to pass so you can pull into the gas station to get your vehicle a drink (and you hope and pray that since you are already way past E that you won't run out of gas before you get pulled in) and when you start heading towards the pumps another vehicle slips in from the other direction to take the spot. THANK YOU!
* When you have the opportunity to eat at a restaurant where homemade pies are a specialty. You don't order dessert right away because you are enjoying the rest of your meal but you continue to see the waitress carrying the most luscious coconut cream pie piled high with whipped cream and topped with toasted coconut right past your table. And when finished and the waitress returns to ask if there will be dessert...well, yeah, what does she think I look like, a lightweight? Of course there will be dessert. "I'll have the coconut cream pie," I'll say in a jovial and almost too anxious voice. "Sorry," she says, "She got the last piece. It seems everyone wanted that today." Oh, my smile turned to sadness and I want to blurt out, "Then why didn't you make more!" But I hold my composure, look over at the lady who is eating MY pie, see the look of satisfaction and under my breath I say, THANK YOU!
* How about when you walk into the grocery store during any of the holidays to pick up only one item that was needed but totally forgotten amongst the two carts-full that I got only the day before. I stood the line for a great deal of time, allowing the cashier to run each item across the scanner and waited patiently as the bagger went back and forth from check-out lane to check-out lane to put the items in the bags and place them into the carts. Disgusted the item is forgotten, I go the next day, hoping to find a quick way out. It doesn't look like it is going to happen. The store is packed, one day closer to the holiday of choice.
Half way down the aisle, you spot the checkout lane, almost finishing up with a full cart customer. You scurry as fast as you can without running to get there. And just as you get within two steps of being there, another full cart customer takes the spot. THANK YOU!
The express lines are not open because no one, but me, is going express today.
* And how about garage sales. It's first come, first choice. You snooze (in the early morning) you lose on the best selection. There are many serious garage salers out there and they usually know what they are looking for before they even get to the sales. Me, I look it all over even if I'm not interested. You spot the macrame plant hanger (one person's junk is another's treasure) and you know that you want, to remind you of your glory days in the 1970s. You are sure that there is not another soul that would want it. But you continue to look, leaving the hanger right where it is so you can see it. And after a lot of looking you go back to the spot and see it gone and notice a customer handing over two shiny quarters for the hanger, complete with beadwork. Oh the frustration and the sadness, knowing the nostalgia won't be lived over again without the macrame hanger.
THANK YOU! for taking away the joy that one item could have brought to me.
Oh, such is life. There will be many more days in your life that you would want to use that sarcastic "Thank You" but hopefully, there will be many more grateful days in your life, too, that you can tell someone you have appreciated something they have done.
Thank you for taking the time to read this column.
* Lorri Glawe is a Pilot-Tribune staffwriter. Reach her at lglawe @stormlakepilottribune.com