Things to Ponder

Why doesn't glue stick to the bottle? None of us can claim that we know everything. Questions arise all the time that I cannot answer. How about you?

Here's some things that have baffled me and made me think. You give it a try.

* How old are you before it can be said you died of old age?

* If humans evolved from monkeys/apes, why are they still here?

* Why is it said that an alarm clock is going off when really its coming on?

* Why are both of Spongebob's parents round like sea sponges while he is square like a kitchen sponge?

* If you pamper a cow, do you get spoiled milk?

* Why is it that if someone yells "duck" they are helping you, but if they yell "chicken" they are insulting you?

* Why do you put two cents in when its only a penny for your thoughts?

* Why do we sing "Rock a bye baby" to lull our little ones to sleep when the song is about putting your baby in a tree and letting the wind crash the cradle to the ground? (that's kind of terrifying!)

* Why do people constantly return to the refrigerator with hopes that something new to eat will have materialized? (Like magic kitchen elfs?)

* Why is it when your sleeping it`s called drool but when your awake its called spit?

* If a teacher were to teach a younger grade than they were teaching before, would they be "degraded"?

* How come people tell you to stay a kid for as long as you can. Yet the moment you do anything childish or immature they tell you to grow up.

* Why does the Easter bunny carry eggs? Rabbits don't lay eggs.

* If ketchup is good on french fries, how come it isn't good on mashed potatoes?

* Where do all the daylight savings hours go?

* Why when people ask you "what three things would you bring with you on a desert island?" no one ever replies, "A BOAT!"

* Why does it say "shake well" on ketchup bottles, but not ketchup packets?

* Is there ever a day that mattresses are not on sale?

* Why does it say do not use before working with heavy machinery on the back of children's Tylenol? Could we save that many people by getting those darn 5- year-olds with headcolds off those forklifts?

* If you only have one eye...are you blinking or winking?

Think about these questions all day! Good luck with your answers.

* Lorri Glawe is a staffwriter for the Pilot-Tribune. Reach the columnist at lglawe@stormlakepilottribune.com